Dear 2000-ish silver Civic,
You were my first really interesting driving story...at least the first I cared to share with anyone. Driven by a skinny high school boy with a buzz cut? Check. Sporting a tacky aftermarket spoiler that's a foot tall? Check. Suddenly belligerent after I pass you looking at you, laughing at your spoiler? Check, but I probably had something to do with that.
Listen honey. Getting out of my way and then tailgating me when I'm going 80 and you were previously going 75 just isn't believable. And then, when I kindly lane over, you hover next to me, window to window, shifting from 5th to 4th. Yes I hear that engine. Let me check...oh okay, after checking MSN Autos it appears you have 115hp. Are you aware that I have 150? Are you aware that that tacky spoiler does not magically add 35hp to your car? Are you aware that you're not in an Si? If you were I might have been intimidated instead of entertained. But this is ridiculous. I realize your car is lighter than mine, and you probably have a chip installed, but I would be happy to meet you at a track sometime if you're paying. I laughed an apology for not wanting to street race at 10pm around semis, braked, and tried to get behind you...but you were braking too? Oh this is too much. When I lane changed to the right of a semi, I knew you would assume I was racing you on the other side, and you sped up according to plan. I lagged behind, got back in the left lane where I wanted to be, and unfortunately lost you in standstill traffic that happened a couple miles up. I've always wondered if I'll ever see you again. I look for that spoiler, roof-height on the back of a Civic that is struggling to carry it. I haven't seen it in two or three months of driving, which means two things: I haven't seen you again, and statistically it is probable that you are the only idiot who has this. 2000-ish silver Civic, I truly hope we meet again. You were the highlight of that six hour drive.
Still can't believe that spoiler,
Allison
No comments:
Post a Comment