Flashers are for alerting other drivers that you've pulled over on the side of the road at nighttime because of mechanical problems. Not during daytime--we can see you then, because there's light. They're also for letting other drivers know that you're going an unreasonable amount under the speed limit, not that you should be, unless you're a tractor on a country road. (If your car suddenly makes a weird noise while you're driving on I-95 and refuses to go more than 30 MPH, that's a sign to pull off, not to struggle along.) But as for flashers, that's about it. Flashers MIGHT even be for if you're parked somewhere illegally and you think the cop is a soft-hearted idiot who will look at those futile blinking lights and say, "By golly! This person is really truly honestly just running in and then running back out, and they mean it! They're risking their battery! I'll skip the ticket!" (and then the cop will presumably continue to stroll along the sidewalk with hands in pockets while whistling a cheerful tune).
You know what flashers aren't for?
Flashers aren't for:
--telling other drivers it's raining
--telling other drivers it's snowing
--telling other drivers it's foggy
As I drive along in the rain or the snow or the fog, it's usually hard for me to see other drivers. And when I'm looking for other drivers (so that I don't crash into them), I want predictability and I don't want distractions. Flashers add an unpredictable and unnecessary stimulus to my already confusing environment and single handedly increase the odds of me killing someone in an accident by a factor of five. And the beauty of it (!) is that flashers are so unabashedly selfish. As I'm traveling along, blinded in part by your flashers and blinded in part by their reflection in the river that has replaced the road we were driving on, it becomes more likely that I will veer left or right into another car, but it's never more likely that I'm going to crash into you. You, with your sun-bright flashing lights marking you as The One and Only Obstacle to Be Avoided, are maybe saving your life while you distract all other drivers, making all of us more likely to crash.
And isn't that something to feel good about?
Oh, I'm sure people who have their flashers on just want to help. They want to make sure other drivers can see them. Well thank you, flasher people, for trying so hard, but I honestly would almost rather be on a bat highway using echolocation than have to deal with these idiots and their makeshift strobe lights. I always hate it when one person puts flashers on in the rain. Because inevitably, some dimwit is going to look at those little blinking lights and exclaim to themselves, "What a GREAT idea!" They will then push that innocuous little triangle button and sail along thinking themselves to be one of the most safety-conscious and altruistic people on the road.
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| You're welcome! |
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Photo 1: http://www.tensionnot.com/pictures/Car/Crazy-Mass-Car-Crash
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